heyy ppl! =)

ahhh so much going through my mind. doesnt mean much stays inside though xD i found im prone to forget what i was going to do lol. like i'll head somewhere, then i'll be like "uhhh... what was i going to do?' =/ short term memory =S or maybe i should say selective memory instead haha.

lalalala mm anyway coming to the end of the second week of uni. been starting at 9am everyday for the past four days. monday was horrible i guess. but yea i think im getting into the hang of it la. slowly getting into a routine haha. but im still sleeping pretty late =/ needs to adjust my body clock and stop stalling for time lol. mm i think starting at the same time everyday helps la. builds consistency xD its abit tiring though. like i can be alert-ish for my first lecture, but then for the later lectures i tend to be more tired =S ah well. but i guess in general its not bad la. i dont have super long days or anything. except for this tuesday, where i had a 9-5 day. but its a one-off thing, so its still ok i guess xD

oh and today i found out that the tutor i have for macroecons is the same guy that i had as tutor for microecons in first sem. lol. wonder if he remembers me though haha.

anyways yea. slowly getting back into the swing of things in uni. i guess theres still things that i struggle with la, but overall its good. =)

hm the other day i was going home from uni, and like the friends that i happened to see going home as well were in pairs. so basically i met two couples that i knew on the way home. and i guess it kinda got me thinking. not that i havent been thinking about this topic before. but seeing them kinda made the feelings i had abit stronger i guess. i think somewhere near the beginning of the year i was thinking to myself that it was about time for me to be getting a bf. like i kinda 'need' one? in the sense that i realised its not good for me to be alone for too long. in fact, i dont really think its good for people to be alone for too long. i dont mind being alone, but i guess it kinda comes to a point where you still dont mind it, but it would be alot better if there were that 'other half'. and yea. seeing couples accentuates that feeling of being left out, and 'alone-ness'. its not loneliness i think. its just that acute awareness of being single and alone. which isnt exactly a bad thing i would say.
hahahahahaha am i contradicting myself?
i guess what im trying to say is that its not a bad thing to be alone. i like it when its quiet and i can be by myself. but i also wouldnt mind having someone to share that peace with me. =)

another thing that has been on my mind is the question of what kind of guy would suit me most? and i think today i got the answer. i reckon im a pretty strong girl. strong as in mentally strong. not as in stubborn xD so i tend to try sorting things out first before i might bring them to someone else's attention.    and i stand well by myself i guess. and i guess given that, i need a guy who can deal with that. not exactly someone like me i think. but more of a guy who can counter me, provide the other side of the balance. i dont mean a mentally weak guy. i wont be able to deal with that. but i guess its more of someone who is equally strong, and would supplement my weaknesses. haha that doesnt say much does it. i guess its a really abstract concept, even just thinking about the guy who would suit you best. aiyah. all in God's timing luh. :')

i guess sometimes im just like, aiyah, someone ask me out alr. but thinking about it, im kinda glad no one has yet. hahahaha but then again, something that crossed my mind was "why on earth am i still single?" hahahahaha xD i mean looking at myself, i kinda dont see any reason why i shouldnt be attached. but well, i cant determine the course of events luh. and i have to admit that i do get impatient sometimes. so maybe its better that i should wait for it. haha.

a very difficult and convoluted thing to talk/think about.
but you do wish sometimes that the person you've set your eyes on would like you back and ask you out. =/
i guess love really is a waiting game luh.
but maybe i should be braver and more open with my feelings. =S
but i wouldnt know what exactly i should do would i?

aiyah ok. kinda just going around in circles, not really getting anywhere =/
need to go sleep too.
night ppl!
ohoh and HAPPY NATIONAL DAY SINGAPORE! =)